Aidee Douglas

Los Douglas are moving to Jacksonville, Florida. It’s a 17hr drive to there! We are moving to live close to family and because we are gypsies and want to keep rocking the people in this world with our presence.

We want to spread the love.

My man left yesterday, a week prior to our real-good bye-San Antonio-date to find us a place and to take his car and one of our doggies. He is going to stay at his sister’s. He is coming back in 4 days.

Do I have a hard time every time when he goes any where for more than a day? OH MY GOD, YES!!!

Yesterday morning when he was living I was crying, sobbing, panicking, I put on my whole drama show. CRAZY and lame, a total breakfast delight! I knew he had to go; its not like he was going to stay just because I was crying, I didn’t even wanted him to stay. I knew he had to go. But still, my emotions took over me, always!

It all started when I woke up at 4am and start my drama show. Crying in the dark until he woke up. He just hugged me and told me it was going to be OK until I fell back to sleep. He knows what to do. Every time he has to go out of town it is the same story with me. My mind goes to a weird place. Like I start thinking that something ugly is going to happen to him. I get the fact that “something” can happen to him everywhere. I KNOW THAT!!! But my brain doesn’t get it and some how thinks that because I’m around I protect him.

PROTECT HIM?? Really? It actually works the other way around. This is not so bad. Let me tell you, when we where newlyweds it took me like 3 months to NOT cry every morning when he was leaving to work!!!! INSANE! I know.

Why? Is love supposed to be this crazy? Is it just me being loco?

I’ve come to realize that he is my drug of choice.

I don’t smoke, I can live with out alcohol, no drugs, I am not even addicted to coffee (I was addicted to coffee before him). My point is that I don’t have any addictions, so the only thing that makes my head spin is him. He is my addiction, my drug of choice. It’s not the kind of drug that makes you say, please rehab me before I am 80 pounds and poor, living on the streets with 20 cats looking for my next fix. It’s the kind of drug that puts me really high with out any side effects.

WAIT! Lets analyze what I just wrote. It makes me high with out any side effects. OH PLEASE, AIDEE STOP WITH THESE LIES!

Of course I have side effects! Lets just go back and read the second paragraph.  I wrote I was crying, sobbing, and panicking. That is my side effect. I was upset for two days! I’m still upset! I don’t feel like doing anything. All I want to do is sleep.  So with out question, he is my  happy drug with side effects and all.

Love is good. It makes you cry a little but it also makes you do extraordinary things. EXTRAORDINARY THINGS.

Tags: Life, Love, Marriage, My Twenties